WHAT TO GET THE TEENAGE MERMAN IN YOUR LIFE
Or, Tristan Hart’s Christmas suggestions.
Christmas shopping for anyone is hard. But for a merman (merdude), it can get tricky. What do you get a mythical being? Ties just don’t cut it, and an Xbox might not fare so well in a saltwater bath. Here are some suggestions.
1. Waterproof watch. Saves a trip to the surface to get a look at the sun. And not everyone can tell the time by the sun, you know?
2. Unlimited supply of bacon. Because there are only so many ways to transform seaweed.
3. Burt’s Bees honey chapstick. Salt water is unforgiving on the lips, and in THE SAVAGE BLUE, Tristan and Layla are going to need it.
4. Sunblock. Don’t worry; they don’t exactly burn like albinos under the sun. But it’s a good excuse to rub down his broad shoulders.
5. Something to remember you by, like a lock of your hair or a fingernail or a tooth. The journey is long and who knows when you’ll see each other next. Plus, it’s inexpensive and you grow them yourself!
6. Rosetta Stone. Does it come in ancient mermaid sounds? They sure sound funny when they communicate underwater and you don’t want to be left out.
7. A compass. Just in case he can’t find his way home.
THE VICIOUS DEEP is out now in hardcover and paperback. The sequel, THE SAVAGE BLUE is coming May 1st, 2013! Mer-ry Christmas and Happy Holidays to all.